Over the last few months, I’ve experienced instances where several people have been passive-aggressive toward me on Facebook. I’d love to think this is just my big ego self-aggrandizing my own place in their thoughts, but I know that at least a few of the instances were directly about things I’ve said or written.
Some of my Facebook friends see me as this elitist, “holier than thou” figure, which they can’t stand because they believe that since I’ve stopped drinking, I am preaching that way of life to them directly.
In reality, when I do write about sobriety, I do it for a different community of people online who are interested in getting well in that particular way. I rarely, if ever, have the people on Facebook in mind when I sit down to write.
I share my stories on my social media as a “hey! Here’s what I’m up to,” but those stories are not written for that audience. Also, I view my writing as a charcuterie board. Take what you want or take nothing. It’s there if you’re hungry.
The world has 7.5 billion people in it. 1109 of those people are connected to me on Facebook, and about 80 of those people see my posts regularly.
Why in the hell do I care about what 80 people think when there are 7.5 billion people in the world?
Your Facebook world is small.
The people on your Facebook are not the main people who are going to be your clients or buy your book. They’re just people you knew once. They’re very likely on a separate path from the one you’re on, and they feel annoyed by you when their current identity conflicts with yours.
It happens all the time.
When I initially began writing publicly, I thought that the key to traffic was to share my stuff on Facebook. What resulted was the same few people clicking my links, and the rest not even seeing them because Facebook algorithms don’t really care for links.
I knew that what I put into the world wouldn’t resonate with everyone, but what I didn’t anticipate was that the people who knew me would start taking the “it’s here if you want it” pieces as personal attacks.
Like, buddy, I don’t care what you do. There are thousands upon thousands of people who need or want positive reinforcement or relatable narratives with regard to their sobriety. If you’re not one of them, that’s fine. I’ll sit next to you while you drink and we’ll shoot the shit. There is nooooo judgment on my part for how you live your life.
The judgment you feel is coming from you.
I’ve decided I’m just going to be done with Facebook for the most part. I’m going to pitch my new website launch to my friends but otherwise, I’m going to focus more on building my email list instead.
I am launching a site where I swear a lot and talk about taking small steps to shift in major ways.
If you want to be kept in the loop, you can subscribe here!